I have three days left to get fit and lose 20 kilos, finish writing my book, turn my home into an austere, minimal sanctuary of peace and joy, spend more time with my friends, learn a new language, and spend less money on unnecessary stuff. It’s not looking good. I’m thinking I need more achievable goals for 2019.
Next year, I’m determined to simply be adequate; no more of the demands on myself that are just plain over the top. Around the house, I’ll never leave dirty dishes in the sink without running a bit of water over them. For myself, I’ll chuck out anything that doesn’t bring me joy, like all my holey knickers. When I find myself staring into space I’ll call it meditation and give myself a pat on the back. I’ll buy more wine, which will guarantee that my friends spend more time at my place. I’ll remember birthdays on Facebook, thanks to Facebook notifications. I’ll find more game apps on my iPad, so I can stimulate my brain and get the feeling of being promoted through competition.
Okay, so I’m being sarcastic. I just want a year off from all of the lies I tell myself in January that I then use to beat myself up with all year. What would it be like to have 12 months off from resolutions and shame? A whole 52 weeks of just living as I will. I’m only thinking of this as I type the words and I reckon I’m going to give it a go. 2019; the year of living shamelessly.
What will it be like for me to embark on this 365 days of freestyle living? I have a friend who has never been on a diet in her life. She’s not skinny, and she’s not obese, and she has refused to look into diets and dieting her whole life. I’m amazed at this and ever since she told me, I’ve wondered how I can apply this kind of attitude to my own life. A year of living without shame sounds like a perfect way to embrace it. Would this have occurred to me if I hadn’t been writing out my thoughts? Maybe not.
Write your life, know yourself. Rachel